Snack Time
by CreativePunk77
Summary: Set In Prime Minister's Brain. AU. Harvey/Ingrid. Harvey has something urgent that needs dealing with.


**Completely AU on Prime Minister's Brain. Everything after the canteen section is from my own mind.**

* * *

 **SNACK TIME**

Cake.

Delicious. Savoury _and_ sweet. Calorific. Numerous varieties available. And a food for loved ones to share.

Yet the one before the five Immune members of SPLAT, though sliced up and placed in bowls which were being spewed out of a machine and along a conveyer belt, was chocolate. Gooey on the inside and soft and warm on the outside.

This proved to be SPLAT's downfall, as the second youngest member of the group _loved_ cake, particularly the chocolate kind.

More and more bowls travelled along and the excitement built up. Lloyd, Mandy and Ian, _sick_ of constantly staring at cake whilst their friend was potentially on her own, several levels up, turned away and strode back over to the rubbish chute, Ian spying a handprint on the way. _Maybe if he touched it, then he would end up being transported to Dinah's location?_

Ingrid gazed at the cake, stomach rumbling. Though she _still hated_ this tower, she realised the importance of the task at hand and spun round, following the others. Once they were all together again, then they could have cake to celebrate!

As the four of them huddled by the chute, they whipped their heads round at the sudden squeak of trainers. At once, Lloyd, Mandy, Ian and Ingrid cried out for their friend to stop, the first screaming at his little brother for being _'such a class A idiot!'_

Harvey Hunter shot towards the treat, ignoring his friend's shouts. A little chocolate wasn't going to hurt! Plus, he was so hungry! Positively _STARVING!_ And had been for _ages!_

Grinning in delight, Harvey shovelled his hands into the first bowl, cramming the cake into his mouth. His eyes widened and he yelped as hands clamped onto his waist and wrenched him backwards. Craning his head round, Harvey gasped out through crumbs of cake:

"Ing-Ing! What are you doing?!"

Ingrid glowered up at him, spitting: "We have a mission to complete! Come on, Mastermind! Dinah needs us!"

Mandy and Ian piped up fellow shouts, whilst Lloyd bellowed: "H, if you don't come over to the chute _right now,_ then I'm going to humiliate you in every way I can!"

Managing to escape his girlfriend's grip, Harvey pouted at his older brother. "But that's NOT FAIR! I AM STARVING!"

Lloyd scowled fiercely at him. "We all are! Now get into the chute!"

"NO!"

"H..."

Harvey recognised the tone of his brother's voice and usually he would instantly obey Lloyd, but this time, _he_ _just couldn't_. Harvey knew that if he did not satisfy his hunger now, then it would only deepen until his stomach got to the point where it incessantly nagged him to gorge on an unholy amount of food, preferably of the junk kind. This would then cause SPLAT and his mother, if she found out about it, to scream themselves hoarse at him for screwing up _again._

Yes, of course he wanted to find Dinah! As the others had mentioned a numerous amount of time, they did too. Yes, he and Ingrid were technically in the least amount of danger due to not being susceptible to the Octopus. And _yes,_ he did fear for the safety of Lloyd, Ian and Mandy. They were his friends, for goodness sake! But hell... He wanted _food!_

Chuckling weakly at Lloyd's look of rage, Harvey yelped when his brother pounded up to him and smacked him on the backside with a firm hand. Hissing at the sting from the swat, Harvey whined:

"What was _that_ for?!"

"Because you are being SO ANNOYING! WE NEED TO FIND DI! NOW MOVE IT!"

Enraged at his little brother's refusal, Lloyd grabbed the bowl that Harvey had been eating the cake from, stomped over to the rubbish chute and flung the bowl into it. Harvey gasped.

"Hey! That was my cake!"

Lloyd whirled round, red in the face. "I don't care! You can eat later! Now hustle! I mean it, Harvey!"

Eyes narrowed, Harvey shook his head, folding his arms over his chest. Ignoring the other members of SPLAT's attempts to get him over to the chute, Harvey thought smugly:

' _He might have thrown away my cake, but there are LOADS of bowls with cake in them, all for me to eat!'_

At _another_ flat out refusal, Lloyd lost it. Roaring, he shoved his face up to his brother's and yelled:

"YOU NEVER LISTEN! YOU ARE SO ANNOYING!"

Harvey jutted his chin out, screaming: "SO ARE YOU! AND I CAN'T HELP IT, I AM HUNGRY!"

As the two brothers screamed in each other's faces, Ian and Ingrid shared a wide eyed glance. Alarmed at the sudden shouting match that had erupted, Mandy sprinted forwards, set on prising the boys apart. Skidding to a halt, she wrenched Lloyd and Harvey apart from each other by a safe distance and proceeded to shove the elder towards Ian and the younger into his girlfriend's arms.

Panting, Mandy shrieked: "Keep them separated! We can't afford to argue or fight. WE HAVE TO FIND DINAH!"

Both baffled and slightly frightened at Mandy's demeanour, Ian set about piling Lloyd with side splitting jokes until the older boy could handle no more, whilst Ingrid partook in one of her favourite pastimes with Harvey. Kissing.

Once Harvey and Lloyd were both breathless, Mandy stamped over to the rubbish chute, barking:

"Hurry up guys!"

As the others hurried over, or dragged over in Harvey's case, Ian's eyebrows shot up to his hairline, whispering:

"What's got into Mandy all of a sudden? She's never _this mad_."

Lloyd retorted: "What else? Dinah."

"Ooh, you mean like _literally?"_

At his girlfriend's cheeky remark, Harvey burst out into raucous laughter. Ingrid grinned, but the smile slipped when Mandy whirled round, steam practically billowing out of her ears. Ian and Lloyd shook their heads as Mandy snapped:

"Harvey, if you don't be quiet _right now,_ then I'm going to have to hold your hand for the rest of the way!"

Irritated that his chance at relieving his hunger had been wasted, Harvey blew a raspberry.

"Big deal!"

Growling in pure rage, Mandy shot Ingrid a frosty glare when the younger girl piped up: "Hey! Holding his hand is my job!"

Before continuing on her rant: "I would be holding your hand only to make sure that you stay safe and so I can see how you like being treated like a _little kid!_ Now, I really don't want to have to treat you like that, but Dinah is the main focus! Not bloody cake!"

Seeing a pout forming, Mandy stamped her foot, spun round sharply and clambered into the chute. Averting his gaze from the other's harsh ones, Harvey waited until he was the lone person in the room before flipping the bird at the chute, wishing that the rest of SPLAT had X Ray vision so they were able to see his rude gesture.

Letting his hand flop down to his side, Harvey skedaddled away from the rubbish chute and back to the conveyer belt. Man, even _Ingrid_ was ruining his fun! Well, he'd show her what happened when his stomach was not given food! And the rest of them!

Harvey halted at the end of the belt, greedily nabbing dozens of bowls that were spewed out of the machine. When he had a hundred bowls before him, Harvey rubbed his hands together in glee, then proceeded to gorge on all of the cake on offer.

* * *

Half an hour later, with chocolate smeared fingers and face, Harvey began to shunt up the rubbish chute. Brown fingerprints left evidence of his presence in his wake. He grunted as he slid upwards, thinking:

' _For fuck sake, I HATE this chute! There better be more cake at the next level!'_

Eventually reaching the next level, Harvey wriggled out and straightened up, pissed off when he saw that he was standing in a warehouse.

' _So pretty obvious, there is no cake… GOD SAKE, I NEED MORE FOOD!... Hold on, where are the others?!'_

Scanning the nearby aisles, Harvey abruptly froze when he heard the pounding of footsteps in the next aisle. Squeaking, he launched himself behind a bunch of cardboard boxes, huddling in on himself as the pair of footsteps rounded into the aisle he was situated in.

The whitecoats strode along, the taller stating tonelessly:

"We have captured the intruders and taken them up to the main section, but the Computer Director is certain that there is still one more to catch. You, take this side and I will take the other."

The other whitecoat nodded, stopping as his companion moved off. Harvey clapped a hand over his mouth. _Intruders…_

' _Oh SHIT! Do they mean SPLAT?! Crap! They must be searching for ME! And if the stupid Octopus shows up, then Ingrid will be the only one able to resist it! I must get up there!'_

However, a small part of Harvey exclaimed that he shouldn't _care_ about the others being captured. As this way, he would not have anyone nagging at him for eating any available food! Suddenly smirking, Harvey drawled in his mind:

' _Yeah, sort of serves them right. Thinking they can treat me like a baby…. Oh god, Mars Bars…'_

A blissful smile spread across his round face as Harvey gazed at the box beside him, clearly labelled 'Mars Bars'. One of his favourite chocolates. Running his tongue deftly over his lips, Harvey waited till the whitecoat had headed off down another aisle, then prised open the box, hands grabbing as many chocolate bars that could fit in his grip.

Unwrapping the first one, Harvey crammed the bar into his mouth, chomping down as he peered out from behind the boxes. Upon swallowing down the mush in his mouth, Harvey released a sigh. The whitecoats had just vanished into the lift, the contraption itself sealing its doors and carrying them off somewhere.

And Harvey was determined to find out the _exact location._

' _But first... FOOD!'_

* * *

Boxes of cookies, rice bars, donuts, various meat slices and chicken wings were only the beginning of the food that Harvey ended up consuming. By the time his stomach was ready to reject the next morsel, he had lost count of at least _half_ the food he had eaten.

Groaning, Harvey rose to his feet, cracking his pins and needles riddled limbs with a wince. Knowing that travelling via the rubbish chute would only end up in hysterics of pain, Harvey made his way to the lift, cringing at how bloated his stomach felt and by how late he was going to be, arriving at the 'party.'

"Speaking of party…" Harvey mumbled to himself as he spotted a tub of ice cream, situated on one of the low shelves. Though his sugar levels were already pretty high, scoffing on this would tip them over the edge into hyperactivity. And Harvey was _set_ on achieving this state.

So one tub of chocolate chip ice cream later, Harvey was skipping towards the lift. His pupils had dilated drastically and his heart was hammering against his chest. Giggling hysterically, Harvey pressed the button on the lift, stepping into it when the doors opened.

Blowing raspberries at the Octopus as it flickered to life, Harvey danced about as the lift sped upwards. Upwards to the Headmaster and his captives.

The lift halted and the doors slid open, steam pouring out. Harvey giggled and jumped into the room, exclaiming:

"Oi! Let's PARTAYY!"

He scanned the roam, licking his lips suggestively as a substantial amount of people gawped back at him. The whitecoats, children in lab coats, who Harvey guessed were the 'Brains', and SPLAT including Dinah were staring in amazement at him.

Grinning cheekily, Harvey slid his hands down his bare chest and onto the only garment left on his body. His Batman boxers. Cupping his dick, he hollered:

"Who wants to _SUCK ME OFF?!_ Ingrid, can get first lick, cause she's my girlfriend!"

High pitched giggling erupted from the youngest Hunter and he clambered onto the nearest table, ignoring SPLAT and the Brain's reactions. Spying his nemesis, Harvey lost his grin. Usually, he would have been petrified and cowered, but now, due to the amount of sugar he had consumed, Harvey did not give a _damn_ if he pissed the man off.

Pointing at the Headmaster with his index finger, he drawled:

"The Headmaster wants to suck me off... I can see it in his face. That big jaw… you would be _perfect!"_

Suddenly, Harvey gasped, jumping up and down. "HEY! Is that why you wore such a long-arse gown at school?! Cause you had your dick out at all times and it was flopping around too much?!"

Harvey snickered at the Headmaster's outrage and mussed up his fair hair. Turning round slightly, he slapped his backside, purring:

"Come and get me, old man. One little boy needs teaching a… _Lesson."_

Cackling as the Headmaster roared and lurched forwards, Harvey jumped off of the desk and raced around to the main computer, eyes lighting up as he noticed a can of coke beside the computer.

Picking it up, he mused: _"Well, this is pretty fucking random._ I swear, this like came out of nowhere!"

Harvey tipped the can back, downing some of the liquid before lowering his head and smirking.

"Bye bye work!"

Pouring the rest of the liquid over the main computer, Harvey guffawed at the Headmaster's howl of fury. All of that work and the Hunter boy had just _RUINED IT!_

As the children cheered at the fact that the Headmaster's plans had gone up in smoke, or this case _coke,_ Harvey flung the can away, cupping his chin.

"Y'all had nice food downstairs, but next time, maybe get something different? Like burgers instead of cake? And if you do, would it _kill_ _ya_ to add some sauces?!"

Harvey snorted as the Headmaster stomped over to him, inspecting his fingernails with nonchalance. He muttered:

"What's up with you, stick insect? _Jeff_ not here to give you some action?"


End file.
